If you have been threatened, despised, beaten and terrorized by the man you once loved, it can be very difficult to consider the possibility of trusting anyone again, even someone like God. As a battered woman, your concepts of intimacy, love, honor, value, and submission have, to one degree or another, been defined by the perversions of your abuser.

Maybe you have just come out of, or maybe are still in, a relationship where power was abused and twisted for self-centered domination. So when you hear Christians talk about "surrendering your life to the love of Jesus Christ" you may think they're crazy. You may have said, “Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I’ve heard all those pie-in-the-sky promises before. I gave my heart, my mind, and my body to a man once. He said he loved me and I believed him. That decision almost got me killed! I’ll never give my whole-hearted devotion to another person ever again!"

However, maybe during times of extreme sadness, loneliness, or despair, you actually read parts of the Bible. Maybe you found yourself emotionally moved by the claims of God's love. Maybe you were even stirred to respond in some way. But fear and doubts began to invade your mind and you started to questions the honesty of God’s words. Maybe your images are different, your experiences or descriptions slightly different, but in essence you found yourself asking some of the following kinds of questions about God.

Many men claimed to love me. What makes Jesus claims of love any different?
My husband said he loved me on our wedding day. But since then, he hasn't liked very much of anything about me. I can’t seem to say or do anything that pleases him. I don't know what I've done to make him hate me so much. But he is probably right. There must be something really wrong with me.

If I open my heart to God and let Him know who I really am, He’ll end up hating me just as much as my husband. When God sees all my faults and failures, He won’t care anymore whether I’m alive today or am murdered tonight.

Why should I trust God? He never answered my prayers.
"Trust me. This time things will be different." I've heard words like that a thousand times. It makes me sick now to think I actually believed them.
I trusted my husband with my love and my life and I ended up alone, in the emergency room with three broken ribs, bruises on my back and a black eye. Then somehow he managed to get custody of the children, the house, the money, the car, and managed to keep his reputation spotless in the process. Everyone felt sorry for him since he had such a "crazy" wife. He took everything from me. The only things he left behind were the bruises. Those eventually disappeared. Now all I have are the scars.

I cried out to God for help many times but He never answered. God never stopped my husband's abuse. God didn't do anything to help me. Where was He all those times I was being hit? Didn’t He hear my screams? It seems to me God was busy helping my husband. I guess men really do "stick together".

What's the difference between being in bondage to my abuser and being in bondage to God?

I've heard people say God requires me to submit to His absolute control. Seems to me I'm being asked to trade one dictator for another. Either way, I still lose. My husband used his power to control me with fear and intimidation. He publicly humiliated me and privately ripped me to shreds.

God will only use His incredible power to do the same. Like they say, “power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.”

Why should I believe God's words are true?
Words are just sounds that come out of people's mouths- noises that really don't mean much and have little to do with reality. Words are just tools to manipulate and seduce people.  They are just lies people utter to get what they want.

God’s no different. He’ll say whatever it takes to convince me to trust him.

What makes God's promises any different from my husband's promises?
I've heard hundreds of promises that never came true. My husband had a very short memory when it came to his promises. Following every beating he promised he would never hit me again, but he did.

In the Bible God makes a lot of promises as well. But what has God ever done to demonstrate He will even remember let alone actually honor any of His promises? As soon as tomorrow rolls around, God will forget all the commitments He made last night, just like my husband.
 
Does God agree with my husband's use of power in our home?
My husband used to scream at the top of his lungs that he was "god" in our home. He said it was his biblical, "God-given" authority to execute justice as he saw fit. I had the right to live only if he said I did. I had value as a human being, only if he said so. My husband has always blamed me for his violence. He said it was his responsibility to bring me into submission. He said if I would just cooperate and stop being so rebellious, he wouldn't have to hit me.

If Jesus believes those kinds of things about women, I’d be crazy to want anything to do with Him. I’d be better off in a relationship with an abusive man than in a relationship with any such god.

Isn't God just waiting to "zap" me the moment I make a mistake?
My husband almost burned my cheek when he held my face close to the open flame on top of the stove. He was angry because he said I overcooked the steak. He wanted to make sure I felt the heat of the fire and would never ruin his meal again.

God watches everything I do. I'm sure He'll notice the instant I make the slightest mistake. Since God is so all-powerful, I don't even want to think about what He might do to me the moment I break one of His rules.

Men are full of insecurities, fears, jealousies, pride, anger and selfishness? Jesus was a man, right? Isn't He the same?
My husband was very insecure. He was so afraid I would be unfaithful to our marriage vows he flew into a jealous rage every time I even said “hello” to another man. He would even get angry when I tried to call my family or friends. He insisted we move to another state because of his job, but I think it was just a way to isolate me from everyone else.

I wonder if Jesus suffers from the same kind of insecurities. And I've heard Christians say God is a jealous God. What makes His jealousy any different from my husband's? In the Bible it says that Jesus got really violent with people a couple of times. God didn't seem to think His behavior was wrong. Maybe God would say my husband's jealous rages were also justified. Maybe God would say I deserved to be punished for wanting other friends.

Does God demand everyone take care of His needs first? What if I was sick or late or forgot? Is God just waiting for the chance take revenge because I didn’t say or do the right thing? Does God even know how to communicate without violence? Or instead of talking to me would He just start screaming from heaven and throw lightning bolts at me?

Who is this Jesus, really? What kind of man is He?
Any one born so long ago, so mysterious and foreign, so distant and impersonal, so "different" makes me a little afraid. Maybe He has ugly secrets or is hiding information about Himself He doesn't want anyone to know about. Maybe He's not telling us the whole story about who He really is and what He's up to. How would I know until it was too late? And besides, Jesus has been dead for two thousand years! Why should I care about anything He said or did?

Do any of these questions sound familiar?
If so, there is one simple reason why you need to consider trusting in love once again. Men lie; God does not! The self-centered love of your husband is totally opposite from the self-sacrificing, self-less love of Jesus Christ. God is not a sly "salesman" or some “good-looking, smooth-talking guy". There is no comparison and no common ground. The differences are irreconcilable! God is God. And He wants you to know there are monumental differences between His love and any so-called "love" you have previously known.

There is an old cliché that says, "To know Him is to love Him." This is absolutely true about God. If you want to get to know someone, you have to begin to pay close attention to their words, their actions, and their responses to life. God has nothing to hide. He is not afraid of self-disclosure or transparency. And in the Bible He lays open His heart for anyone willing to see and understand. He wants to be known.

Some would say there are risks in the development of any intimate relationship. But in considering an intimate relationship with Jesus, the only risk you face is having your preconceived ideas about God changed. If you are willing, you will discover truthful answers to those questions which have prevented you from accepting His Perfect Love. You have everything to gain and nothing to lose in this endeavor.

You are PRECIOUS to God! The love He freely offers you fulfills the deepest longing of every woman's heart. No matter what your age, your race, your social status, your education, or your occupation, every woman wants to be loved. Every woman wants to be unconditionally valued, cherished, wanted, respected, honored, forgiven, accepted, fulfilled, and free. The Bible says God's love gives us all these things and so much more. God offers us divine love. Why would any woman in her right mind say, "No" to this kind of love? Why would any woman ever want to?

Will you open your heart and hear His words? If so, “Please Consider Divine Love.”